How to See Positive in a Negative

7 min readJun 24, 2023

Suffering is a gift. In it is hidden mercy.

Rumi

Most dumbs would wonder how can there be a mercy in the suffering? The answer is that because it teaches us the greatest lessons of life. If it is accepted and understood rightly it can produce endurance and personal awareness. Again, endurance produces character and resilience, and character is a standard of excellence, an adherence to the most cherished values and principles. C.S. Lewis also justified suffering as he pointed out that when we get too complacent and proud in our happiness; suffering wakes us up. In other words it also works as a universal balancing force.

Here are some opening lines from the Dostoevsky’s novella “Notes From the Underground” (Part 1) ,first published in 1864 that give a vivid account of the suffering through the unnamed narrator who tells his imaginary audience:

“I am a sick man…. I am a spiteful man. I am an unattractive man. I believe my liver is diseased. However, I know nothing at all about my disease, and do not know for certain what ails me. I don’t consult a doctor for it, and never have, though I have a respect for medicine and doctors. Besides, I am extremely superstitious, sufficiently so to respect medicine, anyway (I am well-educated enough not to be superstitious, but I am superstitious). No, I refuse to consult a doctor from spite. That you probably will not understand. Well, I understand it, though. Of course, I can’t explain who it is precisely that I am mortifying in this case by my spite: I am perfectly well aware that I cannot “pay out” the doctors by not consulting them; I know better than anyone that by all this I am only injuring myself and no one else. But still, if I don’t consult a doctor it is from spite. My liver is bad, well–let it get worse!”

It shows an acute sense of “consciousness” which he believes sets him above his fellow man. The “normal man” who faces no hardships or extra-ordinary challenges that can take him to the next level of awareness remains “stupid. . . .”

And here is another excerpt that explains how suffering is not but bad but good for him:

“And why are you so firmly, so triumphantly, convinced that only the normal and the positive–in other words, only what is conducive to welfare–is for the advantage of man? Is not reason in error as regards advantage? Does not man, perhaps, love something besides well-being? Perhaps he is just as fond of suffering? Perhaps suffering is just as great a benefit to him as well-being? Man is sometimes extraordinarily, passionately, in love with suffering, and that is a fact. There is no need to appeal to universal history to prove that; only ask yourself, if you are a man and have lived at all. As far as my personal opinion is concerned, to care only for well-being seems to me positively ill-bred. Whether it’s good or bad, it is sometimes very pleasant, too, to smash things. I hold no brief for suffering nor for well-being either.”

Thus many thinkers and philosophers agree that suffering and pain are integral to our existence and that life is a rigorous exercise that is meant to make us strong and mature and thus it is not always tranquil and pleasant. Some other, while emphasizing their views, even exhort that human body and mind is a temple of misery, and there is nothing we can do about it. Even the wealthiest, the brightest, and the luckiest experience boredom, anxiety, and dread. Rich suffer because of their riches (most recent example is that of the wealthy and famous adventurous passengers of Titan Submersible who died when the Titan submersible imploded on its way to explore the wreckage of the Titanic in the North Atlantic.) and poor suffer because of their poverty (for instance the poor victims of the recent Greece Boat Disaster who were killed while trying to escape the misery and seeking sanctuary from war, persecution and poverty in their respective countries.)

Rich seem to suffer even more. According to a report of U.S. National Institute of Health Patients from the high income group who had recently been discharged from hospital seemed to be at two to three times greater risk of committing suicide than patients from the low income group.

But, as has been already explained, there is also a belief that suffering is not meaningless and it has some hidden benefits, such as the cultivation of wisdom and compassion.

And someone puts it more aptly, “if there’s one thing that unites us all, it’s that we all suffer. We all triumph.”

The last sentence seems to be encapsulating the whole idea or purpose of suffering.

Everyone face challenges and obstacles in life. And everyone also questions “Why?” The answer is that they act as a motivation and thus are part of life and also with the lessons often learnt in retrospect. Moreover, without the painful times, there would be no pleasant times. Life would have no meaning or purpose and everything would just seem senseless and superficial, flat and uneventful, plain and boring.

In short, suffering has a purpose but only for the wiser one who has the ability to look beyond or underneath the surface and take the cue from the situation and wake up to see what can be done, and does it.

And whereas, Schopenhauer proposed that in order to reduce the suffering we can limit our desire and in his own words we must set limits to our wishes, curb our desires, moderate our anger, Nietzsche recommends an artistic response to the tragedy of life and an embracing of the suffering it entails.

However, suffering is also just one side of the coin as it is said that every loss is also a gain at the same time and when one door closes another door opens. However, ironically, when one problem is solved another emerges from the ashes of the old.

But that is life as it is a constant struggle to face and then solve the problems with brief intervals of joy and happiness that comes after solving a problem before emergence of another more challenging one from nowhere. The brief intervals also serve the purpose of charging ourselves so that we don’t lose heart and get ready to face the new and more challenging situation. And with that we keep evolving.

In the end I would like to share a classical tale of wisdom that proves how suffering has a hidden mercy as the 13th century’s famous Persian poet and mystic Rumi wants us to believe:

African King and His Optimist Friend

Once there was an African King who had a close friend with whom he grew up.

The friend had a habit of looking at every situation that ever occurred in his life (positive or negative) and remarking, “This is good!”

One day the king and his friend were out on a hunting expedition. The friend would load and prepare the guns for the king. The friend had apparently done something wrong in preparing one of the guns, for after taking the gun from his friend, the king fired it and his thumb was blown off.

Examining the situation, the friend remarked as usual, “This is good!” To which the king replied — “No, this is not good!” and proceeded to send his friend to jail.

About a year later, the king was hunting in an area that he should have known to stay clear of. Cannibals captured him and took him to their village. They tied his hands, stacked some wood, set up a stake and bound him to the stake. As they came near to set fire to the wood, they noticed that the king was missing a thumb. Being superstitious, they never ate anyone who was less than whole. So untying the king, they sent him on his way.

As he returned home, he was reminded of the event that had taken his thumb and felt remorse for his treatment of his friend. He went immediately to the jail to speak with his friend. “You were right,” he said, “it was good that my thumb was blown off.” And he proceeded to tell the friend all that had just happened.

“ And so, I am very sorry for sending you to jail for so long. It was bad for me to do this.” “No,” his friend replied, “This is good!” “What do you mean, ‘This is good’? How could it be good that I sent my friend to jail for a year?” “If I had not been in jail, I would have been with you, and not here with you right now.”

Lesson:

In a very unusual way, the message here unfolds into exposing the following principle about life. “Even though the situation may look hard or suffering undearable, there is always something to learn from it or discover a silver lining.

It is in this way that we slowly gather experience and wisdom, and even though we may think or feel that it is unfair, that’s the way it is. “This is good”.

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